There is nothing left behind me
Wherever you are in the world, I hope that you had a great kick-off to 2018.
If you are following my Instagram or Facebook, you have seen my the end of year message. I would like to share it here.
“2017, thank you. I am simply grateful what I experienced and received in 2017. I am full of gratitude. You helped me to wake me up and activated all potentials. Even these events, which I felt so challenging, were great lessons and brought me the greater understanding, clarity, and purity. At the end of the year, now I know that I have found and learned why I am here, who I am. I’d never accepted myself as who I am before having these events... so this is the completion of my birth by accepting who I am. 2018 will be the new chapter and I am already holding love and joy toward 2018's myself. I will keep practicing to trust myself and reminding me that I am the TOOL. I am the seed of the Earth and I am here to express Peace. A Happy New Year, dear ones”
To be honest here, I was not in this calm and profoundly grateful place in the beginning of December. That is why I was not able to any post blog posts since the end of November.
My physical health was not well from November to the end of December. In fact, my RGCC blood test in November showed a higher number (3.9), a small bump has started showing up around the original location of the first DCIS on my left breast, and there were also some very painful skin issues around the area from the beginning of December. When the skin issues started, I must admit that I freaked out and assumed something really wrong was going on with my cancer.
But then, I decided to think positively. “Let’s stop worrying about it. Let’s stop trying to figure out what I did wrong or what could have caused this painful change. Let’s stop focusing on the past and the negatives. Stop focusing on figuring out why I am in a bad place.” I said, “I just need to focus on healing from here. I just need to trust that I can heal from here and will be good in the future. ”
This mood shifting is really effective. We can cancel out something that should not belong to us. If you keep continuing to worry, meaning, if you stay in a negative place, thinking only of the worst cases, it is hard to improve or overcome the situation. But if you only believe that you will have a better future, and that these negative things do not belong to you, you’ll actually create a better and positive future only.
Then I realized that these physical changes happening to my left breast are actually a message from my body and spirit. I received the message and realized what I really had to do.
My dearest mentor, Vonetta Taylor, has always told me since the very beginning of our work together, “Ran, you need to Stop doing everything, Rest! Slow Down!” She also said many times. “Touch your breast and listen what message it tries to tell you.”
But this was the most difficult thing to commit to me. I loved being busy because I grew up in the high pitch lifestyle in Tokyo.
Anyway, it was a very strong message that my body expressed by showing the bump and skin rashes. I took it seriously, and this time, I took actions to cancel old programs I had. I knew that I can master myself.
Initially, for our winter vacation, my husband and I were planning to go somewhere in warm weather with a beach because our daughter loves swimming. But my body’s message made me realized that it was not time to put stress on myself by planning a fancy vacation.
My husband totally understood. We decided to stay home, and made no big plans at all. I told him that I really wanted to stay home to relax. To focus on my healing, vacation time does not mean that I can play and spend time with them a whole day long. It makes my body very exhausted. He and she can go out as much as they want, but I would not be able to be part of every fun activity. I also suggested to hire a babysitter for some days during the holidays, so that my husband could rest as well. I made it clear to myself that it is not time for me to sacrifice myself to create fun for our lives. It’s time to do everything i can for my healing. I just need to rest as much as possible, like an animal that stays in his cave while he heals himself.
It helped so much. I felt that I finally could commit to all that I have to do.
In addition to this mental and lifestyle shift to finally commit to my healing requirements, I attended a shamanic ceremony close to the end of year. It brought my crucial answers;
- There is nothing left behind me, I have received all the information i need to heal myself. There are no hidden wounds that keep me away from healing.
- My healing and detoxing for the spiritual side and everything else is done. I just need to detox my physical body. My body has accumulated too much toxicity that is way beyond what I could possibly imagine. I need to apply a serious detoxing process.
By following these messages, I have started a new protocol after Christmas, which has already shown some positive changes.
I now declare that I have really completed the first chapter of my healing journey and I just need to detox my body to complete healing my cancer. I feel very clear and am very confident.
Thank you so much for following my blog. I feel so blessed that I can share my experience with you and have your support.
Love and Peace,